Travel has taught me a great deal about other nations, cultures, and myself. Additionally, it taught me a few things about my own country. The more I travel, the more I realize that the Dutch (including myself) have a unique ability to make simple things extremely complicated and complicated things even more complicated.
Seriously! The Netherlands is a great country, and yes, our educational system is very successful, our medical facilities are fantastic, and we’ve built a nice little playground for ourselves to work and live in. But, my God, have we amassed a plethora of complicated and, at times, contradictory habits, rules, regulations, and laws! Here are some Dutch specialties to keep in mind for those of you who are planning a trip to our small country:
Do not attempt to speak Dutch; we dislike it.
You believe Chinese to be difficult? Try to learn Dutch. No, wait, better DON’T! Dutch is one of the most challenging languages to learn in the world. If you’re visiting Holland but don’t intend to stay, don’t waste your time (and ours). If you do so, you will likely sound ridiculous, use incorrect terminology, and irritate us. In contrast to many other cultures, we are not amused when tourists attempt Dutch.
The Dutch and English languages are closely related. Therefore, nearly everyone in the Netherlands speaks and understands English at a fundamental level. Please do not waste our time; simply speak English!
Do not refer to us as Germans!
Our tiny country of windmills, cheese, and wooden shoes is officially known as the Kingdom of the Netherlands. Our nationality is not Dutch, but rather Dutch, just as our language is. We continue to use the old name for Holland, but not in an official capacity. Therefore, Dutch people are from the Netherlands, speak Dutch, and have Dutch nationality.
Many foreigners confuse the terms ‘Dutch’ and ‘Deutch’ and believe that the Dutch are German. BIG MISTAKE! The German word for the German language is Deutch. Germans are native to Germany, speak German, and have German nationality. Dull, right? The Dutch are much more entertaining! Therefore, the Dutch language has nothing to do with Germany.
Do not consume the ‘haring’
This is the proper way to consume a hare.
Haring is comparable to Dutch sushi. We consume it raw, preferably with small onion pieces. It is one of the most popular seasonal treats we offer. The best hare can be consumed during the first or second week of June, when the hare-hunting season begins. If you want to find out for yourself, this is the way to go about it:
1. Support the fish by the tail
2. pass the knife through the onion pieces no more than twice;
3. Raise it high into the air so that the hare is approximately 25 centimeters from your face; (if you look into the hare’s eyes, it’s not a hare, but a joke)
4. Open your mouth (as dogs do when you hold an object above their heads);
5. Protrude your tongue;
6. Lower the haring gently and place a small portion on your tongue;
7. bite down firmly;
8. Delight in the hare (but probably not)
Don’t refer to anyone as Black.
As soon as you arrive, you will notice that Dutch people come from a variety of cultural backgrounds and have various skin tones. Many of us have ancestry in other nations. Some because their parents were immigrants, and others because their ancestors originated in Dutch colonies. In addition, a growing number of Dutch citizens are refugees from countries where human rights are or have been violated.
Due to the fact that Dutch people have various skin tones, we avoid mentioning the skin color of others. If necessary, we will use non-offensive terms, such as light- or dark-tinted. We may also employ internationally recognized terms, such as Asian, Scandinavian, Arabic, African, or Caucasian. It is offensive, discriminatory, and racist to refer to a person’s skin color as “black” or to use the term “black” to refer to a person’s race.
Do not defend children.
Children will defend the elderly, pregnant, and disabled.
If you are riding the bus or train with your children, please do not expect us to stand up. In contrast to some Asian and South American nations, where riding a bus can be dangerous and shaky, our buses and trains are in perfect condition. People in the Netherlands teach their children to advocate for older, pregnant, and disabled individuals. Not only children but also adults will give up their seats. Kids need role-models, right?!
Our trains and buses are safe, drive slowly, and do not make sudden turns or stops. Your children will enjoy riding the bus and our trains. If a pregnant woman, senior citizen, or disabled person boards the bus or train, please have your child vacate their seat.
Do not inquire about our salary!
The Dutch enjoy talking for hours about everything they do, have, need, want, and (especially) dislike! They have no problem displaying their residence, automobile, wardrobe, and new smartphone. Need an opinion? We’ll provide one! Just ask if you need a solution; it’s free! Need directions? We will explain repeatedly where you must go. It’s all good…
We will tell you anything you want or need to know, but please do not inquire about our finances! Do not inquire about the amount in our bank account. Don’t ask how much we spent on vacation, and certainly don’t inquire about our monthly salary! If you do so, we will decline to respond. If we DO provide you with a phone number, believe me: it is a lie!
Avoid eating with your hands.
In the Netherlands, only a few foods may be eaten with the hands and fingers. French Fries, pizza, bread, and meats with many bones, such as chicken and spareribs. It is improper to eat rice, vegetables, potatoes, and boneless meat with your hands and fingers.
The Dutch utilize spoons, forks, and knives. If you are uncertain about which tool to use, please ask and we will explain. Ask for permission to do it your way if it’s not working out, but don’t ask for chopsticks; they don’t have any lying around.
If you choose to eat with your fingers, feel free to lick them afterward. The Dutch practice it frequently. It’s probably not acceptable in your country, but it’s not a problem in the Netherlands.
Avoid walking in the red bike lanes.
They are found everywhere in the Netherlands and are exclusive to bicycles. Bicycle lanes may be incorporated into or separated from the primary roadway. The lanes are distinguishable by their red color. Some are gray, and approximately every 100 meters there will be a bicycle illustration if this is the case. If you see this illustration inverted, you are on the wrong side of the lane!!!
If you find yourself walking on a bicycle lane in the Netherlands and expect a local to move out of your way, you are mistaken: they will not. Worse yet, they likely yell at you and call you whatever comes to mind first, second, and third. If it results in an accident, you are to blame. It is your own fault if you get hurt. He ought not to have walked in the bicycle lane!
Do not ride a bicycle if you lack the necessary skills.
The Netherlands are renowned for many things, including the prevalence of bicycles. There are more bicycles than people in the Netherlands. This is because different activities require different types of bicycles. Everyone owns at least one bicycle, and the majority of us ride them daily.
The Dutch are expert cyclists who expect everyone around them to possess the same level of skill. If you cannot master the skill, you should not ride a bicycle. Remember, even if you don’t ride a bicycle, they still want you to know the rules!!
Do not anticipate impromptu dinners or coffees.
The Dutch pretend to be extremely busy and plan everything. Not only during business hours, but in our personal lives as well. Want to go for coffee, dinner, or to the movies? No problem, but a reservation is required! The Dutch enjoy surprises so long as they do not interfere with their daily, weekly, or monthly routines.
Do not arrive unannounced.
The Dutch are always busy with things to do, places to go, and people to meet, and they meticulously plan everything. They dislike it when you show up unannounced at their door or, even worse, at their place of business or place of work! If you want to meet a Dutch person, you should always call ahead and ask if the meeting time is convenient.
Don’t hide your question in a story
As soon as you begin speaking, the Dutch believe they already know what you will say or ask. Don’t attempt to disguise your difficult question with a dull story; just ask! Indeed, it is absolutely fine! The Dutch have a proverb that goes, “No is what you have; yes is what you can get.” If you want something from us, you should avoid irritating us with a long apology and boring story, and instead get to the point.
Remember that the Dutch are extremely direct. If they require something, they will directly ask you for it. They will certainly let you know if they don’t like something.
Do not refuse to shake hands.
A handshake is the customary method of greeting a Dutch person. No bow, no embrace, and certainly no kiss. If we visit your country, we will adapt to your greeting style, but if you visit ours, we expect you to make the necessary adjustments. If you must decline a handshake for religious or medical reasons, do so with tact and always provide an explanation.
The rules for a handshake are quite straightforward. We make no distinction between men and women, nor between young and old. In the Netherlands, new relationships are always initiated with a firm handshake, regardless of wealth or occupation.
Avoid being overly protective.
The Dutch enjoy discovering everything for themselves so that they can form their own opinion. They enjoy trying new things, discovering new things, and conducting a variety of experiments. No need to caution them about something, they don’t want to hear it and are eager to experiment!
Sure! The Dutch will politely listen to you, say “thank you,” and proceed with their original plans. If it has a satisfying conclusion, they will say, “See, I told you so!” And NO, that does not work in both directions! If something does not have a happy ending, you must be empathetic and understanding, helpful and encouraging, and you may not say, “See? I told you so!”
Do not dictate how our children should behave.
Parents, police officers, teachers, and, in some small villages, priests, pastors, imams, or reverends are the only individuals permitted to instruct our children on how to behave. Everyone else should be quiet. If you have ANY behavior issue with a child, you must address the parent, not the child.
If you disregard this simple rule, you will inevitably find yourself in a heated argument that you have already lost. Whatever error the child may have made, yours is far worse! Always address the parent prior to speaking with the child.
Do not tell us how to parent our children.
You do it your way, whereas we do it our way. Unlike many other cultures, few remnants of old Dutch traditions remain. The Dutch prefer to raise their children in accordance with the spirit of the modern world, and parents will adapt accordingly.
Don’t you DARE to jump the queue!
At the grocery store, in the store, and other locations where you must wait in line, you must also wait. Pregnant, old, sick or d.y.i.n.g, we don’t care: you wait! In the Netherlands, cutting in line is a grave social offense! However, you may try, with the grace of God, to get our permission. If so, this is the optimal strategy:
1. If you are at the end of the queue and are in a hurry, walk very, very slowly in the direction of the first person.
2. Ensure you make eye contact with every person in the queue and use a facial expression to ask their permission to take their place in the line.
However, if they permit it, do not move into that position; instead, continue moving forward. If someone doesn’t respond, it means they dislike it but don’t want to make a fuss, so you should move on.
4. Repeat this with each individual in the queue, and whisper “thank you” to each person you pass.
5. When you finally reach the front of the line, ask the person in front of you for permission to go ahead of them. Ensure that others see or hear you requesting permission and always providing a valid reason.
If permitted, assume their position and perform your task.
If you achieved success, congratulations: you took a substantial risk! Now, create a wonderful experience for those you left waiting. Turn around and greet everyone in the line with a smile or a “thank you.”
Drive only on the right side of the road!
In the Netherlands, we do things properly! We drive, ride, and walk on the right side of the road, not the left. When inside a shopping mall or store, we keep to the right. If you are in front of a building with multiple doors, the doors on the right are for entering and the doors on the left are for exiting.
If you are in a bus or train station, an airport, or any other location with an escalator, the right side is for standing, while the left side is for people in a hurry.
Don’t give cash as a present.
If you are invited to a dinner with a Dutch family or a children’s party and would like to bring a gift, do not bring cash but rather a gift. Only if you are an extremely, extremely, extremely close friend can you give money as a gift.
Do not place the gift in a bag; instead, wrap it in colored paper. If you don’t, we view it as a lazy shortcut and believe it would have been preferable for you to offer nothing. Except for children’s parties and weddings, it is acceptable to arrive without a gift in the majority of situations.
Wedding parties are the only occasions where giving money as a gift is acceptable. Put sufficient cash in an envelope, and don’t forget to include your name. When you arrive, you typically present the gift to the newlyweds and offer your congratulations. If this is not the case, instructions will be included on the invitation; therefore, don’t forget to have someone translate the invitation for you.
Please note that, in contrast to many Asian nations and with the exception of wedding gifts, the Dutch immediately unwrap their gift upon receiving it. We do not wait for everyone to leave.
Don’t inquire about us regarding Black Piet
Everyone loves Piet, but not all love BLACK Piet…
One of our traditional holidays is known as Sinterklaas, which is similar to Santa Claus but better and a few weeks earlier.
Do not depart without notice
When in the company of Dutch people, such as at a party, you should always allow us sufficient time to process your departure. You will frequently observe that when one person leaves a party, others follow suit. If you’re the first person to leave, you’d better come up with some damned good excuses, and you’re allowed to lie:
Tomorrow I must rise early; the nanny is waiting for us; I have a long ride ahead of me; I must complete my work; we must let the dogs out.
The optimal time to announce your departure is five minutes prior to your departure. Ensure that at least two or three people are aware of your plan. Some will act very surprised and insist that you stay a little longer. That is merely a cultural response; they do not actually mean it. Only when they insist vehemently that you stay longer did you probably leave at the wrong time.
If they they respond with: ‘Ja ik ga er ook zo vandoor’. (Yeah, after a short while, I’m also going), then you hit the jackpot and picked the right time to go!
Do not depart without saying goodbye.
In some cultures, it is perfectly acceptable to leave a party without telling anyone. In the Netherlands, that is a HUGE error! When it is time to depart, the Dutch shake hands with everyone in the group, including those they dislike. When going out with a group of friends, it is customary to arrive and depart as a group. If you came to the party with your husband, wife, or other significant other, do not leave without them!
If you DO leave without notifying anyone, we will assume you are upset, ill, or in trouble. We will call you to inquire about the situation. If you do not answer your phone, we will search for you and may contact the police to file a missing person report. Always say goodbye!
Do not touch our children
Dutch parents are fiercely protective of their offspring. Only parents, friends, acquaintances, and professionals working with their children, such as doctors and teachers, are socially permitted to touch their children.
Strangers, especially tourists, are prohibited from pulling their children’s hair, grabbing them by the arm, patting them on the shoulder, or even worse: kicking or hitting them (not even as a joke). And NO, they do not appreciate it when you strike their baby’s face, grab their tiny hands, or (worst of all) attempt to hold them.
Do not anticipate auto-respect
Respect in the Netherlands is not contingent upon a person’s social standing, level of education, wealth, or background. No matter your position, if you behave like a jerk, you are a jerk, and we will treat you accordingly. If you are a good person, they will be sure to tell you!
The Dutch believe that respect is only possible when it is reciprocal. If you display yours, they will undoubtedly display theirs.
Avoid traveling to the Netherlands in the winter.
There are four seasons in the Netherlands: spring, summer, fall, and winter. Spring and summer are the ideal seasons for a trip to Holland. There is absolutely nothing happening here during the fall and winter seasons. They are the coldest seasons of the year, and all Dutch tourist attractions and hotspots are closed.
Spring includes the months of March, April, and May. (Good time to go)
Summer consists of June, July, and August (Best time to go)
September, October, and November make up fall (Bad time to go)
December, January, and February make up winter (Worse time to go)
Do not act like a Dutchman
The Dutch adore foreigners, so they will automatically adore you (unless you’re from Germany, of course). As long as you are willing to accept that we may do things differently here, we will be the best of friends! Your visit to our little cheese country helps us better understand where you’re from and what the social norms are in your country. Please teach us as much as you can about your philosophy and way of life, as we will likely travel there one day. I am confident that you will have a wonderful time in our lovely country.
Topic: 26 Things You Should Never Do Or Say In The Netherlands
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